The Journey

During love-making, many of us often feel an internal pressure or even an external expectation to have an orgasm to prove the extent and culmination of our enjoyment.😩

This tension can lead to disappointment when we don’t climax, making us feel like we haven’t “performed” or haven’t shown our partner how well he/she/they has pleasured us. 😞

This performance pressure can keep us stuck in our heads, shut down communication and make us feel fear, shame and a sense of failure around our sexual lives. 😟

The good news is that it doesn’t have to be like this at all 🤩

One of the most liberating aspects of Tantra massage is that it is non goal-oriented. 😮‍💨

In Tantra we ride with the waves of our Kundalini or life force energy  🌊.

We slow down, connect through our eyes and hearts and get curious about each little touch 👁️ 💓

Sometimes there is a soft, calm grounded arousal. Other times it’s fast and fiery. And the only aim here is to surrender to the sensations and open to the pleasure. Each journey is rich and diverse and there is no doing or achievement necessary. 🙌

Ironically, when we take the focus away from climaxing, we are often more receptive to experiencing ecstatic states. In fact some of my most blissful moments have been during an extended Tantra massage when I have been completely immersed in the moment to moment sensations. When my mind has finally let go and I am fully present to the deliciousness of each tender loving stroke. 🍑

The pleasure lies in the receiving. In the yielding. In the noticing. And this takes away all of that unnecessary pressure to perform. 

What do you notice when you slow down whilst having sex with your partner or yourself? 

Curious to know 🧐